One of Those Days

Does anyone else just have one of those days where they just wonder why they bother? For the past week or so I’ve actually reached the point where I’ve just been wondering, why do I bother with it all? I don’t like saying it like that because I don’t want people who know me to get the wrong idea and think I’m suicidal again after 6 years. I’m not. It’s just sometimes I sit back and wonder, why?

I go out to work where I put in 200% effort or more and get hardly any appreciation for it. Being a sales assistant I also have to put up with a whole lot of BS from customers too about things that aren’t my fault. Then there’s my home life. Being back home from Uni for the summer means living with my parents again. It’s not like I’m part of a bad family. It’s not like that at all. In fact, it’s the complete opposite. However, no matter how much I do to help around the house my parents are always moaning at me to get off my butt and help out more. It’s pointless trying to point this out to them when they always just turn around and repeat the same, good old party line “It’s not enough. Help more. Oh, and pay us rent!”

Then there’s my non-existent social life. I’m more “socially” active online than in the real world even though technically that makes me unsociable. I just feel like, certainly around where I live, technology and your online presence are more important than your real-life presence. It makes actually talking to people awkward and undesirable. I’d love nothing more than to be able to walk into a coffee shop and see people talking. Nope. All I see are people sitting across from each other on their mobiles. I’ve been sitting at a table before and the couple next to me were texting each other as they sat across from each other. Occasionally, they’d look up, smile at each other and say “That’s so sweet/cute”.

Every now and then I like to completely close off all technology, including the internet, for a few days just to clear my head and make sure real-life still exists. Of course, now it doesn’t appear to at all. Why should I bother? I’m pretty sure almost everyone in the developed world doesn’t realise how much they are missing out on by having their eyes and hands glued to their smartphones. I hate to say it but the phrase “Smarter phones, dumber generations” is actually becoming more obviously true. This is all going to sound like I’m just ranting again but, quite frankly, I don’t care. Writing about this stuff is cathartic for me so I’m going to write it all anyway.

Now, most people I know from work and high school spend their Friday, Saturday and sometimes even Sunday nights in a club/bar/pub drinking the night away. All the while, heads stuck in their online world. Completely oblivious to what’s going on around them. Apparently the fact that I’d much rather go home, relax and go to bed at a reasonable-ish hour makes me a complete freak. Even dating has gone online now and apparently online dating sites have seen a massive increase in subscribers in recent years. Some people I know use them and wonder why they’re still single and I just want to hit some of them. How hard must it be to put down the phone for an hour? You might run into the love of your life if you did. How well can you really get to know a person over the internet? You can’t even tell if they are who they say they are.

There are so many opportunities for everyone in the world and even though most people have what they need to live and more, like smartphones, we choose to toss those opportunities in the trash by keeping our brains attached to our phones. Has anyone ever stopped to think about people their own age who barely have enough food and water to live? Most of them don’t have smartphones or any kind of online presence and yet look how much happier they are to just be alive. Society nowadays seems so unbelievably carefree and people seem to forget the one important thing. They are alive, healthy and, most likely, have more than enough material items, as well as necessities, to survive. God forbid we should switch places with them. In a world where it’s now possible to Google every little thing you want to know about, most people wouldn’t have the necessary survival skills to survive what these people in underdeveloped countries do every day.

Bottom line? Most people in the Western world have everything they could ever dream of yet we are so ungrateful to be alive. We are born, forced to go through at least 11 years of education (At least in the UK) and then made to work pretty much until we die. In between all that, we shop and spend money to boost the economy for “future generations”, spend 70% of our “spare” time online and another 20% of that “spare” time sleeping. We are literally bred like bees are. Born and worked to death. Most people who live in poorer parts of the world are at higher risk of catching hundreds of diseases which we in the developed parts of the world don’t have to worry about, spend a lot of their time travelling to get water, which is often dirty, and working to cultivate their own crops, most of which are sold off to the developed countries to keep our waistbands growing while theirs shrink.

So, why do I bother at all? Why do any of us? Honestly, I really don’t know, but there is one thing I know for sure. I’d much rather be alive and working my butt off for a pittance until I die than be dead or, worse, to not have been born. Everyone on the planet was put on this Earth for a reason. We are all beautiful, amazing creatures and just need to believe in ourselves more. We’re all meant to make some sort of difference to someone/something in this crazy madhouse they call Earth. Am I always grateful to be alive? No. This post is a pretty good example of that. Though, I’m not sure you’d be able to find a single person who can honestly say that they are 100% grateful to be alive every second of every day. Everyone will find something to moan about and take for granted in their life. If we had almost nothing though I’ll bet we’d be more grateful to just wake up every morning. I try to be thankful for everything in my life, every hardship and every success, even the smallest things, but it’s not always easy. When you’ve seen and been through what some people have, life truly is an uphill struggle on a rollercoaster ride but, literally, the only thing you can do is Stay Strong and fight your way through everything that comes your way.

Nothing difficult is permanent unless you choose to make it so. Try making a difference, it will help make you feel like you have accomplished something on this Earth when your day comes.



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